Category Archives: emotional health

Books that Have Formed Me Spiritually: Part 2

This blogs flows out of a question a friend recently asked Pete and I around books that have most shaped our journey with Christ. I noticed a couple things: I follow authors more than books so each author is a person whom I respect and resonate with. I love books that, for me, are profound but nuanced in very practical ways. I read them more than once. I read them slowly and prayerfully. The Attentive Life, Leighton Ford I know Leighton personally. Every time I’m in his presence I cry. That’s because every time I’m in his presence I’m given presence – attention, value, time stands still. In this book Leighton leads us to experience God’s presence the way I do when I’m with Leighton. New Seeds of Contemplation, Thomas Merton This book led me into a conversion of heart that slowed me down to enjoy God and receive His love in deeper ways. Again, doing for. Read more.

Books that Have Shaped Me Spiritually: Part 1 (of 3)

A friend recently asked Pete and I for some of the books that have most shaped our journey with Christ.I was surprised at how easily several came to my mind. I noticed a couple things: I follow authors more than books so each author is a person whom I respect and resonate with. I love books that, for me, are profound but nuanced in very practical ways. I read them more than once. I read them slowly and prayerfully. Here are my first three: 1. Let Your Life Speak… Parker Palmer 2. A Hidden Wholeness….Parker Palmer These two books articulated for me the essential truth that life is lived from the inside out. Leadership/churches can have all the “best” programs in the world but if one is not in touch with the interior movements of their heart, then life is just a matter of adjusting chairs on the Titanic. Doing must flow from being.. Read more.

Leaders that Sabotage Themselves: Part 2

Daniel Goleman’s research on emotional intelligence established that people who fail in life and work has to do, more often, with who they are (EQ) then what they know (IQ). Many people have built on this work over the years. David Dotlich and Peter Cairo in their book, Why CEO’s Fail, identify 11 detailers they consistently found in CEO’s and senior leaders in their work around the world. They are: Arrogance: You’re right and everybody else is wrong. Melodrama: You always grab the center of attention. Excessive Caution: Your mood swings drive business swings. Habitual Distrust: The next decision you make may be your first. Aloofness: You disengage and disconnect. Mischievousness: Rules are made to be broken. Eccentricity: It’s fun to be different just for the sake of it. Passive Resistance: Your silence is misinterpreted as agreement. Perfectionism: Get the little things right even if the big things go wrong. Eagerness to Please: Winning. Read more.

Leaders that Sabotage Themselves: Part 1

According to Robert Hogan, an industrial psychologist and professor, two-thirds of the people currently in leadership will fail; they will be fired, demoted, or “kicked upstairs.” The most common reason will be their inability to build or maintain a team. (Hogan defines leadership as “the capacity to build and maintain a high-performance team.”) Why? Certain dysfunctional tendencies, which lie outside their awareness and are invisible, only reveal themselves when people are under significant stress or lack rest. These deeply ingrained personality traits cause smart, well-intentioned leaders to act in illogical ways — making poor decisions, alienating key people, missing opportunities, and overlooking obvious trends around them. I have seen many church leaders rise and fall over the last three decades. A friend who teaches leadership at Harvard and Stanford recently introduced me to the research around this theme. See Why CEOs Fail (Dotlich and Cairo). Every leader has significant vulnerabilities and derailers. Great ones. Read more.

The Gift of the "Wall"

Emotionally healthy spirituality requires you to go through the pain of the Wall, or, as the ancients called it, “the dark night of the soul.” Circumstances and crisis beyond our control interrupt our plans. Chapter 6 of Emotionally Healthy Spirituality unpacks this theme, but a further insight has emerged for me over the years. It comes from someone who spent a lifetime in prayer and silence, a French Carthusian monk, Augustin Guillerand (1877–1945): Someone (God) wounds our soul with a wound that will never heal, and it is through that wound that He finds His way to the very center of our being. Ponder this today as you walk through your own setbacks, disappointments, and difficulties. Think about it: How else can God peel away the hard layers of our false selves in order to free us?

10 Qualities of an Emotionally Healthy Wedding

Out of the experience of our daughter’s wedding last Saturday, we realized there is such a thing as an “Emotionally Healthy Wedding.” Here are a few reflections as to what made it such a distinct, rich experience: 1. We Gave a Gift of a Fixed Amount of Money and Let Go. Because this was a gift, they controlled the wedding, not us. There were no strings attached. They made the decisions and asked us for input along the way 2. We Were Aware of and Managed Our Own Anxieties. There were plenty of things to worry about, from 6 inches of rain the day before our outdoor wedding, to the groom’s grandfather dying 4 days before the big day, to other people’s attitudes that were challenging. We paid attention to it and responded appropriately. 3. We Rejoiced. This was not simply a weekend event, or nine months of preparation, but a lifetime of labor in. Read more.

Preparación sabática: Cómo planificar y prepararse para tu primer o próximo año sabático

Seminario web gratuito en vivo

Seminario web gratuito

Revolución en la cultura de la iglesia

Una visión de seis partes que transforma vidas profundamente